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Posted by
Sam
It’s a long foregone conclusion that women don’t curse. And a man who doesn’t curse is assumed to be closer to his woman counterpart. In fact a woman seen cursing is assumed to be uncouth whereas a man cursing is considered banal. With equality of the sexes clearly settling down as a major event of the last century , this has been much away from the regular.
Its more to do with the human psyche – or to put it more bluntly – the male brain. Since childhood, boys are aggressive and pushy. In fact mostly you would find boys who aren’t pushy enough ending up in showbusiness.
But the remarkable aspect of the sex difference goes beyond this simple irony. If you have seen a tom boy gal who has spent a lot of time with her guy friends – you would be surprise to see her use the 4 letter word once a while. On the other hand a guy who spends a lot of time with the girls (call them MIRLS), wouldn’t use swearing as a display of his authority. So in logical conclusion, it’s the peer that makes all the difference. In fact as men age – they get gray hair. But as women age – they only get older.
So in defense of my sex – cursing is a way of nature to make us superior. Without it any manly duel is incomplete and any old friend get together just doesn’t make sense !
Posted by
Sam
Its been a long and difficult year for the chickens. In my earlier post I mentioned the answers to the critically acclaimed question of the century – Why did the chicken cross the road.
This time things have been different. With more than a Million birds being killed in MH alone, the future of the egg seems bleak. Not to mention the future of the chicken itself. Its like war – people have taken up their arms against the entire species. Many die heroically – facing their deaths with a chuckle, while others are killed in their sleep. Many a bird must have lost its sleep over this avian fly running across the world.
Last week saw the flu hit a suspect in MH. Before the birds knew what happened, their nemesis, dressed in white coats and face masked downed on them like superman does on his villains.
But there is a slight economic angle to it as well. Assume you bought like 2000 birds last month and hoped to make profit. Now that the flu is around – you are left with 2 options – either to wipe off the stock and suffer a loss or somehow hide the birds and when the scare is over, and bird prices hit the roof – start selling them. The basic instinct of any man is to help himself. In this case the lesser of the 2 evils – the bird flu will let the greater evil - man , be the cause of his day of reckoning.
As the terminator says – Asta Lavista ….. BABY !
Posted by
Sam
Here we are back with our senior folks trying to answer yet another ridiculous question that neither tests their aptitude nor their appetite. May help them get better bowel movements though …
Q – Who came first - the chicken or the egg
George W Bush – This is not of importance to America. Today American kids are doing drugs and the military is a hogwash. I have seen many presidents come and go before me but none have ever been faced with such drastic changes in the American culture.
Tiger Woods – the previous question wasn’t taken seriously enough. I think the golf ball was the first to come. Since it couldn’t go into any hole in one – the chicken decided to lay an egg.
Jessica parker – whatever gets into my bed , under the covers fastest – would come first. If I come first … good for me !
Abdul Kalam – the children of this great nation are homeless and hungry. I have all reason to believe the egg came first. Although after reading my books, which no one understands, I can change my opinion.
Pramod haque – Norwest Capital shall invest $5 Billion in the next 400 years in developing a technology that will solve such irrelevant queries. Although I don’t see much sense in purchasing 25% of PSPL – I do see tremendous growth in technologies that go into solving such minor queries.
Abu Salem – Why don’t you ask Salman Khan
Salman Khan – Why don’t you ask Saif Ali khan
Saif Ali kha – what ?
John Abraham – can I get to do a more stupid movie. Hey – what if we make a movie called chicken n Egg – the true story. Will RGV produce it if I give him a job ?
Vivek Oberoi – can I answer that question please ?
Abhishek Bacchan – I think Aish is the prettiest lady on this planet. I mean – she and I have a very open relationship. I sleep with 6 different women thoughout the week. And she sleeps with 243 different things in a week. I have seen her in bed with a cow and a horse. The horse was doing the cow from behind and Aish was cheering on.
Vijaya Mallaya – Whatever man … get me some water with this whiskey ! is my learjet here?
NRN – I shall leave this Egg and the Chicken and settle down in timbuctoo. At least the weather there is better. Not to mention the traffic and the road. Hey – why don’t we set up a Infy development center with a seating capacity of 5 Million ? we can make each engineer sit on another one’s lap – just like chickens do when they are mating.
Rahul Bajaj – has anyone seen my Wharton degree? I think the chicken ate it !
Aamir Khan – Mera rang de basanti Chola …
Steve Jobs – Does the chicken know how much money I have ?
Posted by
Sam
Hey all,
Coming here after a long time.
Feels good ….
Last month saw me getting engaged to my loved one. We are finally on our way and as someone rightly puts it – we are the champions. It isn’t easy maintaining a relationship and definitely not so when you are 1500 miles apart. But we have fought our battles and on 5th Feb 2006, me and my to-be-wife took our first step towards a married life.
Just yesterday lying in my bed – I was wondering how life takes turns and you cant see whats left behind. A few months back I was running around and trying to make my ends meet. Today I have a responsibility that many refer to as an EXTRA. But thankfully for me she has been more than a support. I perhaps don’t tell her this to often enough.
Things change …. As they say. I believe …. As I say.
Thinking of taking a small break. Offlate I have become pretty philosophical and tend to belt out my philosophy at any given (or not given) time and place. Its strange – now I understand why most philosophers are such loners !! Time flies by. I have to get things done. Today isn’t the best day to share my thoughts. May be tomm.
Heard a great song the other day – posting its lyrics. Try to make sense….
Tommy’s daddy kept a six pack in the fridge
We thought we were old enough to do what daddy’s did.
It didn’t take us long to go from drunk to really sick
When I walked in my house I stumbled just a bit.
You play it cool but its no use,
Dad aint no fool and that’s the truth
Chewing gum won’t cover up that smell
You can’t hide one single thought
If you try you’ll just get caught
When somebody knows you that well.
We lost daddy in 1999 I took care of everybody’s pain, except for mine,
Then one night my wife took my face in her hands
She said, “I think its time you cry for your old man.”
You play it cool but its no use
She aint no fool and that’s the truth and
my tear drops finally fell,
You can’t hide one single thought
If you try you’ll just get caught
When somebody knows you that well.
I could probably do more to help my fellow man,
But life gets busy and I hope God understands
Someday when I get time, I’ll do more than my share,
Funny how I’m thinkin’ it sittin’ in my easy chair,
You play it cool but its no use,
God aint no fool and that’s the truth,
And he won’t let you fool yourself,
You can’t hide one single thought,
If you try you’ll just get caught
When somebody knows you that well.
