That fateful day ...

                                      Throughout school and college i have been someone of a loner (at least with the women). Its perhaps because of my continous battle with the carbohydrates or my arrogance towards the superiority of my sex.

 

i dont know why but sometimes god punishes you by treating you to the most wonderful of tastes, smells and feel. In other words, i have had the most memorable days of my life in agony, pain and loneliness.                                     

 

I was travelling to Delhi to be a part of a loving union between my sister and her TBH (to be hubby). They have been somewhat resillient towards the various societal and peer pressures they faced when they decided to take the plunge - and hence cleary classify as my heroes.

I had started smoking then and smoking on platforms was legal (at least i believed so). I am standing and smoking and see this sweet girl sitting on a Railway post with her friends. They are all giggling n laughing. I am smoking. She doesnt even see me. I saw her and said to myself - 'cute'. but i know women like her are way over my league. They deserve better. (is this getting too senti ... ?)

 

Anyways - so i enter my Sleeper compartment and see that she is entering the same compartment. For a sec i was a little ecstatic. Its not everyday that you have cute girls travellign with you right ? But because i had ticked off god when i was 3 - he decided to get back at me at this very moment. Some old UNCLE comes and requests me if i can change seats with him. So now she is sitting ONE seat away from me - but i have to now shift almost 30 seats away. The signs were clear - the universe was protecting her from me ....

 

Jhelum Express leaves Pune at 5:30 pm and reaches delhi at 9 pm the next day. I sleep off on my 'exchanged birth'. The next day around 10, the same polite UNCLE comes and says - 'Beta you can go sit at your original place'. I didnt know if i should be happy or sad - but i guess god must have had pity on me or somethign. I go back and see her sitting. She of course didnt notice me - and even if she did - didnt really care ! heh heh ...

 

Today after 4 years of being together - i just wonder what are the chances of you purchasing your train ticket at the SAME time and for the SAME day's travel , just as your to-be-wife purchases it.

 

Male Alimony

It seems from now on a MAN who cannot support himself it entitled for Alimony from his Wife..... WOW !

The thing that hits 'below the belt' is that can a Man's ego allow that. Sure - the Society allows it, the Judiciary allows it (in fact recommends it), but can a MAN be a MAN and let his ego come in between.

 

Traditionally the man has always been the bread earner. No matter how smart or how much muscle a man has - very few are comfortable knowing their female counterparts are better than them. Some (read me) work to ensure they remain on top and others simply dont get involved with a competitor. Women too in fact look for a man who is better in a good bunch of things. This has nothing to do with a woman's ego. Its just that she sees her kids protected and a future with a man who is better than her in lots of things. One of which is MONEY.

 

Bottom line - if you are a man reading this - ask yourself - Would you be happy knowing your wife brings in more than you do ? Would you accept an Alimony if your divorced wife offers you one. I am fairly certain - your testosterone will scream out and ask for death before such ludicrous proposal.

 

ROCK Cult

 

Whats with this 'Cult following' towards rock music. Why do people who listen to so called 'ROCK' consider themselves musically superior to ones who listen to other forms of music like POP or classical.

 

If you meet someone who is a ROCKER, you will smell the arrogance and the general air of indifference towards all other forms of music. People who swear by people like Morrison and Floyd think they know most about music and are 'better off' than most other mortals who are addicted to NSYNC and backstreet boys.

 

Part of the blame lies in the construction of the genre of ROCK. The idea behind the Doors crooning 'common baby light my fire' or Hendrix playing live at woodstock, is 'self expression'. These guys dont play music for others. And THATS where the 'religious' angle to the whole thing emerges. Every religion has a following. Not because it teaches you what you want to learn - you learn what it wants to teach you ! so you start seeing the world from their eyes. You start to see the reason WHY and HOW. The answers emerge and the questions fade into insignificance. Everything starts to make sense.

 

In fact THIS is what the cult is all about. The reason why there is an instant connection between 2 Floyd fans or Knoffler fanatics is that they see what Waters sees. They can literally 'see' the music float in their minds. Some of the solos are not just music. For all its worth - it could be a call to the devil himself !

 

Another thing that the adulterated form of Rock (Metal) tends to point at is the DEVIL. ACDC, Iron Maiden and many others followed the anti christ and people followed. This isnt cause people are gullible - its more so cause people start seeing the world from Dickinson's eyes and the words make sense. Kurt Cobain was notorious for ridiculous lyrics and no music sense. His genre of 'grunge' was somehow taunted by many as 'non music'. Even today after having shot himself 21 years back, his fan following can out number the population of China !

 

One of the most inspiring musicians of all time has been Ozzy Osbourne. When young, he wanted to become a PLUMBER ! He once chewed the head off a LIVE bat on stage and with Zack Wylde, went on to record some of the finest pieces of music. Ozzy invented Metal - Metallica perfected it !

 

But coming back to the basics - right from lively Elvis to frustrated POD, music of all forms has had great following. Axel Rose was sued for concert misbehaviour and he retorted back sharply - 'go ahead sue me - i have lots of money'. In terms of popularity, I bet Al Capone would have had a stiff competition from some of the bands at their peak.

 

But if music has fan following everywhere - why do rockers think ROCK is better? Why do they feel that the noise they listen to has more music than what NSYNC have to say ? Perhaps thats cause THEY hear melody in the NOISE. You would jsut hear the NOISE. So they claim to have better senses and seem to understand music better. Also people 'progress' to Rock. U start with POP or some plain country and slowly build your self to understand Slayer and Sepultura. So someone who is a metal fan has been thru the loving and romantic songs Backstreet boys sing. They are on the other side of the fence.

 

Theres 'something' about the grass on this side - come over and taste it. You will know why we are better !

 

 

 

 

 

 

Hell n Back

2nd Sept 2000
10:30 Pm
IInd Year Engineering
This was the day I could have crossed into hell....

Joel - a very good friend of mine is a PATHETIC rider. I mean he owned a black Honda Splendour and he was just saaaaaaaaad ! Also let me tell u - Joel met with an accident and has 2 Titanium screws in his right knee.
Its sunday and we decide to eat out.

So we head for a place called 'Burger King'. We have a nice dinner and chat and we are returning ....
We are on FC Road and a Bike just zooms by. (those were the times when I had my mom's scooty as a commuting device). I recognized that the pillion on the bike was the same Hot female we both were drooling at back in Burger King. So i raise my hand (and my voice) to share this with Joel.

Out of nowhere, i look to my right and this Sumo pulls up at like break neck speed right along us.
Now i am wondering WHY is he driving along side us.... this guy starts to sway towards us. I can see the distance between Joel's Handle bar and the Sumo reducing. The sumo comes close and gently nudges the bike. (joel till now had NO CLUE wat was going on). Joel slightly swerves. The Sumo sways back away from us.



And then ....
The Sumo comes and BUMPS into us. Full on ....
I saw joel's head hit the ground like a ball. Thankfully he was wearing a helmet. Then i Hit the floor.
For a sec i didnt realize what happened. All i knew was that i was rolling all over the floor. I get up and check to see if all my bones are ok.
They were - i guess all the paranthas with Amul Butter i ate when i was a kid finally paid off.
Joel on the other hand was screaming and lying under the bike about 10 feet away from me.

People gathered and helped him up. I walked to the side walk. My specs are gone - so i can see SQUAT !
i am touchign myself (so as to say) and cudnt believe i was fine.

Then i touch my face and feel something sticky ....
i bend over and its like a TAP has opened. Somewhere from my face, there is this red colored liquid flowing out. As if there is no stopping it.
This guy comes and says 'its ok beta - dont worry - sab theek ho jayega'. I'm like - WHAT theek ho jayega - HUA KYA HAI??
these 2 girls come along and give the guy a bottle of water. he puts my head back into the light to pour the water over my face. Just as the light hits my face - i hear these girls gasp - ' OH my god !'

Now i am gettign worried here. Not cause I am bleeding. But probably that small thing in my head called the brain may have got displaced. Its very small u know and can get lost easily!

These guys stop an Auto and take us both to the Hospital. WHen i reach the hospital i see Joel - his right knee was about 6 inches lower than the left. The Screws had got displaced. Now this was serious. In fact when joel got his operation done - it was a miracle there was some cartilage left for the surgeon to re attach the screws - else he would have been limping for life.

I'm sure this story would be far better had HE told it ...

Well anyways. So we reach the hospital. The doc comes in. The bleeding has stopped.
He looks at me and asks - 'err ... hmmm .... have u ... i mean ... are u under any influence of alcohol ?'
after i convinced him that i was not drunk (not cause i didnt want to - just cause i had NO MONEY), he got to his job.

Today after 4 years - i still carry a faint scar below my right eye. The skin below my right eye was slit and bled itself out. My right eye was not visible - All the people could see was a blood filled eyeball. The guy who said 'sab theek ho jayega' thought i lost my eye.

Technical details -
The specs i was wearing were made of glass. When my head hit the floor, the glass smashed and slit the skin below my eyes. U must be thinking - HOW LUCKY ! Thats not the only 'slit' i got. The 'white' part of my right eye was slit too - about 4 cms. It could have been my retina. I would have been writing this article with one eye !

Helmet pehno boss - thopda badalne mein der nahin lagtee ....

the BRAND

I had the fortunate chance to 'touch and hear' an iPod the other day. This friend of mine couldnt keep his hands off it !
Its flying off shelves in US and its a rage in the Indian Pocket-heavy-tech-savvy community.
Lets backup a little.
Its not the BEST Mp3 player in town. People know that. People accept that. But it still sells like crazy.
Its not the CHEAPEST player in Town. People know that. People accept that. But they still fish out money for it.

When a company develops a product - the idea behind it is to sell it. But HOW does one do it? HOW do you 'convince ' the buying party that this is something their life is incomplete without.

Chefs say you eat with your eyes - in other words - what 'looks' good - catches your attention. To a great extent thats true. Of all the 5 sense we have, i guess the sense of sight is the most important to convince the brain. You see Mallika Sherawat and want to copulate with her - without knowing if she is any good in bed or not! You see a ferrari and want to drive it - without knowing if it actually drives better than a maruti. (of course it does - its an example) 

Apple made a hit with the MAC. It was all about the 'Look n feel' of the thing. And even today - you buy a MAC only cause it looks cool. Steve Jobs pulled off a fantastic stint with the iPod. Its sleek, it looks cool and every newspaper in town is talking about it. What more do you need. End of the day - its something that every pocket wants !Take another example - the Bajaj Pulsar vs The Honda Unicorn. The money Honda spent on Unicorn's ad spend was significantly more than what Bajaj guys spend on their Pulsar. But the magic is pretty much evident. 1000 of these pulsars selling everyday !

So - is the Look and Advertising really the ONLY parameters to ensure a products success ? What decides the success of a product? In case of the Unicorn - unfortunate that it comes from the 'Honda' stable. Guys dont buy bikes to commute. Its a statement. The kind of guys who ride a 'Honda' dont have girl friends.
They simply dont need em !
The mental 'Image ' of a Honda is 4 cylinder - 1500 cc water cooled - 6 speed - 160 Bhp - top speed 250+ Kmph. Now when i say i have this AWESOME 150 cc air cooled - 13.3bhp - 5 speed - top speed 100Kmph bike from 'Honda' - it seems to me that this is some NEW HONDA company based out of Bharuch in Gujrat !Its like saying Ferrari is launching a 1000 CC car in India with the most Fuel Efficient engine in the Universe ! Who cares !! I dont buy a ferrari for its FUEL ECONOMY !! 

And THATS what the iPod guys are cashing on - people are willing to spend MORE for what they 'want' than what they 'need'. The reason is simple - you dont compromise on your WANTS. Think about it ...

The concept of price is critical. Companies like HLL fight hard to make sure their products go to the Middle Class bathrooms and kitchens. Companies like Diamler Chrysler only raise the prices of their cars cause they know that people who WANT em - will pay watever it takes !

The sheer 'desire' to want it is the ONLY reason why cars like Ferrari will sell even when there is no petroleum on this earth. Maybach had a target to sell only 10 cars in this year of 2005. They sold 6 on the day of the launch. probably by now they have over shot their target.The idea makes good sense. Make a product that has exceptionally high quality. Sell it to a select few. Make it good and make it expensive. Sell lesser numbers. Generate approx the same revenue and laugh all the way to the bank.

Does this makes sense .... ?